Today I saw an interview with Howard Dean, former Presidential hopeful-turned-ecstatic-embarassment-to-the-Democratic-party and current chairman of the Democratic National Committee. (Granted, while the interview was on Comedy Central's The Daily Show, it did spark a thought in my head.) During the interview, Dean bobbed and weaved Daily Show host Jon Stewart's questions regarding what exactly the Democrats would have done differently than the Republicans. He sounded like the broken record that was John Kerry 8 months ago--"We would have balanced the budget, not gone into Iraq, and found health coverage for every single American."

As Stewart comically pressed further for something unique and of substance from Dean, the chairman declared that the Democratic agenda can be summed up with this, "Love thy neighbor as yourself, and you don't get to pick your neighbors." The studio audience, predictably, gave him a rousing applause with the statement. He also got cheers by noting that the "morals-driven" Republicans have largely ignored the fact that the Bible has 3,000 references to the poor and zero references to gay marriage as they ignor the poor and rigoroursly push gay marriage bans through legislatures.

I must admit, I appreciated Howard Dean's paraphrased quote from Matthew 22. However, overall I came away from the interview a bit jaded. Just 2 minutes before quoting Christ, Dean humorously was apologetic for being Christian. Throughout the discussion he made constant jabs at Republicans. It was painfully obvious that each catchphrase, quote, or joke he made was to solicit a response from the crowd--whether it be laughter, clapping, or cheers. As a Christ-follower, I winced as he came across apologetic for being a Christian. I rolled my eyes as I heard him criticize the Republicans without giving definitive answers. And thus, I took in his Biblical references with a major grain of salt.

Anyways, all that to say, (and in the distant light of reading God's Politics by Jim Wallis several months ago) I'm a bit weary of the current state of politics today. It appears whatever party is weaker (currently, the Democrats) simply relies on criticizing the ruling party, without providing any intelligent answers to current issues/problems. Meanwhile, whatever party is in charge (the Republicans) attempts to manhandle, bully, and enforce it's own agenda and policy.

While the Republicans threaten to have its way in Congress unless the Democrats bow to their demands (whatever happened to "Compassionate Conservative"?), the Democrats continue to simply blame the Republicans for the state of the world today.

Personally, the mess of all this, with many key figures on both sides claiming Christ, has caused me to become disenfranchised with public policy in America. What's the answer to this? Many of my friends and colleagues would argue that the best way to deal with it is to fight it...on a grassroots level if need be. For me, knowing that this whole arena naturally is displeasing to me anyways, I'd be much more inclined to take a step back from it and have nothing to do with it whatsoever.

Of course, washing one's hands of a critical issue has never really proven wise, has it Pilate.

When I was in the dating world, I often scared off potential courters with talk of wanting to have enough children to field an entire soccer team. Luckily for me, Faith allowed me to talk such shenanigans...either ignoring me for the time being or secretly hoping I was off my rocker. Regardless, baby talk--err, the talk of having children, has seeped into our conversation on a daily frequency.

Early on the talk consisted of potential names, whether we'd pick (as if we could) boys over girls, how many could we pop out before 30, etc.

Now, the tone has changed to one of preparation--what we'd do if we got pregnant without health insurance, what cuts would we make from our current budget to accomodate a child...or two, how would we take care of it while I'm on the farm and Faith's in school full-time? Stuff like that.

Even though we've gone from a dream-like "what if" to a somewhat nervous "what-if", we're very much approaching the end of the year as if we could be parents by the end of the next. To be frank, the possibility thrills us. Personally, I've always wanted a huge family. Friends have jokingly told me that they figured I'd get married just so I could have kids. Now that I'm married and closer to kid-hood, the desire remains strong.

For a while, I've tried to analyze and figure out why I've wanted a large family. I've thought that maybe it's because I came from a very close, strong, intact, loving family. I've thought that perhaps it's because my family has never let me down. I've even considered that maybe I want a bunch of kids so that while we're living overseas, they'll be relatively free from the materialism and affluence that surrounds us here in the States.

I suppose all those possibilities carry at least a little weight, some more than others. But today I came across an article from Relevant magazine that spoke much truth on the issue. The writer, Stephen Simpson, is a brand-spankin' new dad...of quadruplets! In the article, he humorously points out the horrors of late night/early morning feeding times and the lack of adequate time to snooze. But what knocked my socks off was his veracity in describing the lesson on selfless sacrifice that he's learned from parenthood. Simpson is a speaker and Christian psychologist who tackles tough issues and provides support and advice for those in need. He confesses that everything he's done in his life, has been for selfish reasons. For "kickbacks". When he exercises, he does so to relieve himself of the guilt from the pizza he ate the day before. When he speaks and counsels others, he does it for "spiritual epiphany" or to feel good about himself.

However, in becoming a father, Simpson has been hit with the fact that he's not getting any glory by waking up at 4:17AM to feed a screaming infant. Everything he does for his children is out of pure, selfless love for them. And he notes that it's when he's with one of his children that he feels a "deep, potent love"...not unlike God's love for us.

As I read this article, I found my mouth and eyes wide open as I realized part of the reason for my strong want of child. Much like Simpson, I've done the Christian leader thing. I've been a speaker, youth minister, saver-of-souls, etc. But underneath it all is a current of a self-serving sense of adequacy that comes out of...well, to put it bluntly, being paid (or getting "kickbacks") to be a Christian. But with fatherdom, self-service must be chucked out the window. There's no pride that can be gained from 3 hours of sleep and a lack of "date nights" with the Mrs. And it's in the giving completely of all, that an understanding and familiarity of Love blossoms.

But what do I know? I'm no daddy. Yet.

I've copied and pasted the entire article below. It's a beautiful commentary that's worth reading.

"4:17AM"

By: Stephen Simpson

This is where God lives. And sometimes I hate that.


It's 4:17 a.m., the morning after we brought home our first baby. By "first," I don't mean we plan on having more someday; I mean that there are three more at the hospital that belong to us. My wife had quadruplets three weeks ago, and since the babies were premature, they come home one at a time, when each can handle eating and breathing on his or her own. Emma Grace made it out first, since she goes through a bottle of formula like a frat boy chugging beer.


Having a newborn baby home has been a tremendous blessing ... and a total nightmare. On the one hand, having four healthy babies has been a miracle. Since quad pregnancies are high risk for mom and the babies, anxiety filled the 33 weeks running up to the birth. When they were all born healthy and beautiful except for some typical preemie woes, we rejoiced along with a host of family and friends.


But I'm not rejoicing right now. My wife woke me up at 3 a.m. because the baby needed to eat and our dog was freaking out because some diminutive creature making earsplitting sounds had invaded her territory. I grumbled, rubbed my eyes and went to do what I must. I chilled out our dog, told my wife to go to bed and finished feeding the baby. Since she needs to take some medicine at 5 a.m., I figure I'll stay up instead of sleeping just long enough to get started on a really good dream. Something involving the Caribbean, room service and lots of sleep.


See, I'm not good at this stuff. Don't get me wrong—the love I feel for my children has motivated me to do things, like changing a diaper that looks like a Hershey bar exploded, that I previously thought unbearable. But I hate it when anything messes with my schedule. Make me do something that interferes with my daily workout, and I get pissed. Mess with my sleep, and you'd better bring a weapon. But I can't be like that anymore. I have four little helpless people and an insecure dog depending on me. If this is hard with just one, I’m dead once all four get home. I'd buy stock in Red Bull if I were you.


But this is exactly where I need to be. I accepted Christ at age 7, but I have a feeling that this is where I become a Christian. I have to do something hard just for love rather than glory, money, pleasure or even some spiritual epiphany. For maybe the first time in my life, there's no kickback. Of course, loving my children and watching them grow in wonder and discover awe are huge rewards, but it's gradual. I can’t stand doing something painful and difficult with no immediate gratification. Even when I exercise, I get the immediate removal of guilt for the pizza I ate the day before. When I take care of my kids, I do it just because.


And that's what's going to make me a Christian.


I've been working for The Man in some form for a long time. I was president of my youth group by age 14, an InterVarsity leader in college, a youth pastor by 22, and now I'm a Christian psychologist who writes and speaks in public about Christian things. But if I'm honest, I mainly do that stuff for me. I usually check myself and give God the glory by the end, but I begin most things because something is in it for me. I like the adrenaline rush of tackling tough issues in the name of Christ. It makes me feel cool and smart. I feel neither of those things right now. I feel overwhelmed, jittery from too much caffeine, and my ears are ringing from the last time Emma was screaming.


Yup, this is where I become a Christian, because I can’t pretend I’m doing this for someone else while I lap up all the glory on the sly. I have to do this only for love. I always imagined that God had some Great Thing for me to do before I croaked. I was pretty sure it was writing a best seller or keynote speaking that changes lives. I was wrong. If I can survive being the father of quadruplets, that will be my Great Thing. Not quite as sleek and sexy as having a book crawling up the best-sellers list. Not nearly as hip as speaking at conferences where people tell me how witty and wise I am.


Thank God, because all that other stuff would only make me more full of crap. Even if I accomplish a Great Thing for God, changing a diaper in the middle of the night will do more to make me a real Christian. Jesus sacrificed Himself for the glory of God and the love of humanity. He didn’t do it to make money, to look cool or to feel smart. Learning to sacrifice for my children will go a lot further toward making me like Him than becoming a pithy, popular sage who dispenses edgy Christian wisdom.


Oops, 5 a.m. Gotta give Emma her medicine. I get to do something that isn't about me right now. There's something freeing about that. I don’t have to stress about getting my book published or my next speaking gig. I get to forget about my career for a while. I get to forget about me for a while. I’ll hold Emma Grace in my arms, look into her beautiful eyes and feel a deep, potent love that I’ve never felt before.


This is where God lives. And sometimes I love that.



Dr. Stephen Simpson is a psychologist and the Clinical Director of Fuller Psychological and Family Services at Fuller Theological Seminary. He lives in Southern California with his wife, Shelley, and the quadruplets. Simpson is now addicted to caffeine and bouncy seats.

Mission Waco offers a "Poverty Simulation" each month--a unique weekend-long program to help church and college groups "understand the issues of poverty" while getting "a small glimpse of being poor for a weekend." For a while, it was mandatory for all Mission Waco staff to participate in a "PovSim", as they're so affectionately called in these parts, so I became homeless for one weekend back in 2001. After becoming a youth minister, I all but forced my high schoolers to partake in the 40 hours of poverty. As a result, over the past 5 years or so, I've figured that I've participated in or helped with 12-15 PovSims.

All those hours haven't dulled my fondness for the Poverty Simulation weekends. Throughout the entire weekend, participants are continually pushed, challenged, and stretched as they try to redefine their boundaries and stereotypes of poverty. The leaders at Mission Waco get a steady stream of letters each year from past PovSim'ers who have made changes in their lives as a result of the temporary homelessness they endured.

Granted, the Poverty Simulation has it's flaws. There is a sense of safety the whole weekend for the participants--a safety that the homeless are unfamiliar with. In addition, during the weekend, everyone is well aware that by Sunday afternoon they'll be resting and eating comfortably in their huge, carpeted, air-conditioned homes while those who are really homeless will be battling the elements and hunger for many more days and weeks.

As a middle-class man, these conflicting feelings and judgements of the Poverty Simulation keep me honest. For I know that the Poverty Simulation doesn't truly capture poverty for the participants. Then again, Mission Waco never makes such a claim. They pledge to simply provide a "glimpse". So as I let these thoughts battle in my head, I look to force myself to extend these "glimpses" into longer ventures, so that hopefully, eventually my life will be saturated.

On a parallel note, I came across an article in the Miami Herald a couple of days ago...which actually got me thinking more about the Poverty Simulation, and thus is responsible for this whole post I suppose. It seems a local businessman (among others) in Buenos Aires, Argentina takes tourists on a "reality tour" through the poorest of neighborhoods. For the cost, they get a local guide, meal from a street vendor, captivating stories, and plenty of photo opportunities. While nothing like the Poverty Simulation I'm sure, I imagine these tourists walk away with a whole new appreciation for those who struggle, and hopefully a disdain for the discriminatory affluence that has infected middle America.

Read the article, it's quite interesting. Go on a PovSim. Allow a glimpse, eh?

While reading the news today, I found an extraordinary interactive gallery of Haiti entitled The Eroding Nation. I beg you to watch it. It is filled with dialogue, diagram, and photography that superbly illustrate one of Haiti's biggest problems--erosion. This tropical country was once full of beautiful trees, such as mahogany. But now, trees are literally nowhere to be seen. When we travelled to Haiti in March, we found out that wood is such a rarity that when people build houses, schools, etc., they have to actually rent the wood used because it is so expensive. Further, when wood isn't desparately needed, it isn't used. For example, you'll be hard-pressed to find a chair in the villages of Haiti that doesn't use goathide for the seat.

So please take a few minutes to explore Haiti: The Eroding Nation. I've visited this south Floridian article several times, and each time I find myself with my mouth gaped open when viewing and reviewing some of the photographs and video. If you've got an interest in poverty in underdeveloped nations, or if you are simply wanting to get a better understanding of where Faith and I hope to go to, you'll be given an accurate account by The Eroding Nation. It is truly a unique blend of life, beauty, poverty, and dread.

What wood can be found is chopped up and scorched in a process to turn it into charcoal. Women and children haul huge bags of the precious commodity up and down Haiti's roads each day.

Being the film junkie that I am, I tend to hesitate recommending movies on here. However, last night Faith and I watched The Agronomist, directed and produced by Academy Award winner Jonathan Demme. The Agronomist is a very interesting and informative documentary about the late Jean L. Dominique--former Haitian investigative journalist who believed very much in democracy.

If you're interested in gaining a better understanding of what in the world is exactly going on over in Haiti, see this movie. (It just became available to rent.) It covers, pretty effectively I might add, the last 50 or so years of Haitian history & government and it's relationships with the United States. Most books/commentaries/news agencies you come across will typically be very much one-sided to either the left or right, while this film simply and beautifully shows one man's fight for democracy and justice for the peasantry of Haiti.

Go rent it. Watch it. Talk to me.

Peace.

Over the past couple of posts, I've talked about two seemingly unrelated topics that suddenly merged for me yesterday. In my last post, I posed the question, "What does Good News look like for ________?". Meaning, Christ wasn't simply a message or a sermon. He was active in the lives of all those whose paths he crossed. So as Christ-followers today, what does the Good News look like to the many different types of people who we meet from day to day? In prior posts, I've discussed the "undermining" of Haiti--how, throughout Haiti's history, it has been subject to plots, coups, and overall petulance from within the country and without.

Yesterday, as I was completing the book, Getting Haiti Right this Time: The U.S. and the Coup, by Farmer, Goodman, and Chomsky, I noticed these two ideas (the identity of Good News and the underming of Haiti) actually join together. Amy Goodman, co-author, was interviewing Jean-Bertrand Aristide, president of Haiti before being overthrown. The interview took place as Aristide was preparing to travel out of exile and back into the Caribbean. During the interview, Goodman simply asked, "What do you want to happen now?" Aristide answered,

I always call for peace...CARICOM, which means all of the heads of the Caribbean countries, call for peace and restoration of Constitutional order....This is what I also call for. Allow me to give you a very simple example. Peace means for us, in this time, education and investment in health care. In my country, after 200 years of independence--we are the first black independent country in the world--but we still have only 1.5 Haitian doctors for every 11,000 Haitians...Peace means investing in human beings, investing in health care, respect for human rights, not violations for human rights...

President Aristide, before being elected into office, was a Catholic priest. Further, he served in the poorest of districts in Haiti. So he's aware of the plight of the poor. And he knows the Prince of Peace. Therefore it's not completely surprising to hear his initial response when asked about his concern for Haiti. As a leader and a priest, his concern is the same--for his people to receive the Good News. And what does that look like in Haiti?

Perhaps it would take the form of his italicized quote above--"Peace means for us, in this time, education and investment in healthcare." Of Christ's obvious roles on earth, it seems he fit that description quite well. How many times can you recall Christ teaching or being referred to as 'teacher' and how many times do you see Christ healing?

What does Good News look like for...


...the sick?



...the outsider?



...the orphan?



...the aged?



...those too poor for school?

Peace.

I'm a man of many weaknesses. They range from sweet tea and milkshakes to the Weather Channel and the latest movies. Today I paid the price for another of my flaws--driving. When I hit the road I tend to turn into an impatient, offensive, wreckless, lackadaisical maniac with no regard for those I blow by, cut-off, or run off the road. When I first started driving I paid dearly as I often recorded traffice tickets. However, with the oncoming of marriage, a receding hairline, and debt, I've been able to avoid being pulled over. Until this past April. Long story short (too late!), I was pulled over for going 20 miles over the limit on the interstate while trying to pick up a pal at the Dallas airport.

So, today I found myself at a defensive driving class. Six hours of yawns and films made when I was still in elementary school. Topped off with a sub-par buffet meal. Typically, these day-long events are made to bore you into never wanting to speed again. However, today was a bit different. For some strange reason or another, in this class of approximately 30 people I was able to meet some interesting characters, and overhear conversations between others.

A sampling of the class:

There was the young college girl whose parents immigrated from southern Asia. She insists on living alone while refusing to travel back home to her parents who only live 4 hours from her.

During a break I met a 70 year old lady whose three children are adults now. She frankly told me they've abandoned her after all her years of raising and supporting them. All she has left is her pet dog who is the only 'person' to listen to her. Now, she's certain that if something bad were to happen to her pet dog, she'd "shoot herself with a gun before the day ended". (her own words)

Then there's the middle-aged man who felt it necessary to keep his occupation a secret when asked by some of the group. The only thing he let know about himself was that he couldn't understand why we, as American citizens, couldn't speed a few miles over the speed limit without being in danger of getting a ticket.

Meeting and talking to these folks today made me think. A question often raised where I work at Mission Waco is, "What does "Good News" look like to _______?" For example, what does Good News look like to the struggling single mother of four? What does Good News look like for the homeless ex-convict who can't land a stable job because of his criminal history? What does Good News look like for the child who goes home from tutoring everyday to a father who may or may not be drunk?

In the Gospels, there's reference after reference of Christ going out to preach the Good News of the kingdom. He also commanded his followers to go out and do the same. For the most part, it seems evangelical Christians have historically preached the Good News of the kingdom of heaven. However, something's missing. I see it everyday at work. People come in off the street or out of the projects knowing the story of Christ. That's the problem...it's simply a story. Somewhere, whoever has done the "preaching" left out a crucial aspect in Christ's example and instruction--action. In the Bible, it often came in the form of good deeds, healing, resurrecting the dead, driving out evil spirits, feeding the hungry, etc.

So at Mission Waco we often challenge ourselves with the aforementioned question: "What does Good News look like to ________?" For it's simply not a message.

As I pondered on the mix of people that I had brief contact with today, that question came to mind,

What does Good News look like to the young college student estranged from her parents?
What does Good News look like for the elderly lady who has lost faith in life?
What does Good News look like for the paranoid man who is simply looking for a break?

In the Bible, the answer was different for each person. As Christ-followers, how do we seek to effectively give Good News to each person we meet?

"The locomotive of Haitian politics is not the ballot but the coup." Dr. Heinl in Written in Blood.

The quote from above is from the book that many of you have heard me mention--it's a mammoth of a whale that gives an extensive lesson on Haitian history. In my last post concerning the Undermining of Haiti, I discussed very briefly about the outside but direct influence the United Sates has had over Haiti. In upcoming articles, I intend to delve deeper into the issue. However, this opening quote makes an important point, in that in all of Haiti's history, violence (or at the least, revolution) has been behind every new change in leadership.

Haiti's constitution has arranged for the country's presidents to serve one term of 4 years before giving up their seat in an election. Never has this happened in her 200 year history! The typical process is something like this: President A is ousted by President B in a coup, where President A narrowly escapes death by running to foreign legation and/or exile in another country. President B then eventually takes control of the country (by military force), unconstitutionally naming himself "President for Life". Eventually, President B is overthrown in the same manner which he rose to power. Occasionally, a president is assasinated. Once or twice he serves his constitutional term and is forced or pressured to step down peacefully. Never has a peaceful exchange of leadership occured by election.

Why is this you ask? The reasons are too numerous to count. A popular one among Christian circles is that the Haitians made a deal with the devil in order to win their freedom from the French. Some sympathizers make note of the military influence. Early on, Haiti's army was powerful and corrupt. Over time, especially with the U.S. becoming more involved early last century, it weakened. At times, it has even been disbanded, which led to an easy coup led by rebels who had no fear of facing a Haitian military. So Haiti's internal military influence has either been too powerful and corrupt, or nonexistant so that it couldn't even defend its own government.

A third influence that covers a multitude of reasons is outside influence. Kidder writes in Mountains Beyond Mountains, "Haiti, a catastrophe covered with the fingerprints of the Western powers, most of all those of France and the United States." As I listed above, Haiti has certainly suffered from problems that point back to themselves. So much so that they'll never begin to recover until she has taken responsibility for her actions. However, ever since the little island's discovery by Christopher Columbus, Haiti has been subject to external abuse and neglect.

Looking at the opening quote again, while the coups mentioned certainly were internally driven, some have been set up and funded by other countries. That said, where does the average Joe start in looking for hope? Within the country there appears to be no stability, and from outside there are power-hungry politicians and leaders trying to contsruct their own little government.

So where does one begin? It's not a question easily answered.

Came across an ad for the One Campaign today. Generally I don't pay much attention to pop-ups or ads I see online for relief agencies...I tend to stick with more of the grassroots, local folks. Perhaps its a bit of skepticism or doubt, as to the legitimacy or intentions of superstars sitting with AIDS babies for photos. Maybe some of it is due to the accessibility of the grassroots campaigns.

Either way, I gave the One Campaign 15 minutes of my time today and became really intrigued. So much so that I signed their delcaration and put a banner on the sidebar of this site. I encourage you to give them a good reading. They do draw in a wide (and I do mean wide) array of celebrities. They also have the now-popular wristband deal going on. Impressingly, their founders are very well-respected Christian (like World Vision and Bread for the World) and non-Christian agencies.

But what really drew my attention was that they have a plan. A goal. They're aiming high, way high to be sure. They're not just saying they want to fight global poverty and AIDS. The One Campaign is going right at the leaders of the richest and strongest nations (Canada, France, Germany, Italy, Japan, Russia, the United Kingdom and the United States) at the G8 Summit in Scotland this week.

How specific is their goal you ask? I won't go into all of it because One.org does all that. But, they do make a convicting stand: they're asking that the U.S. direct an additional 1 percent of its budget towards the basic needs of those in the poorest countries. Why 1%? Call me naive or too idealistic, but it seems feasible to me. Could be due to the fact that President Bush's proposed budget for the next year includes a nearly 5% increase in spending for the Department of Defense, which would be $419 billion. Or maybe its because Bush is finding it necessary to cut $500 million from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, making its budget a whopping $4 billion. Either way, seems like 1% wouldn't be too hard to find somewhere.

Further, the One Campaign is asking the leaders of the richest countries in the world this week to to give more and better aid, to cancel the debts of poorest countries, and reform trade rules so that poor countries can earn sustainable incomes. A theme found in Jim Wallis' God's Politcs, I certainly back the call. Aid can always be increased. The debt that the poorest nations take on is so ridiculous that it throws them into a harsh and viscious cycle that promises to keep them in poverty. And current trade laws do that for the very people living in those countries!

So, if you get the chance, visit the site. Read through it. As easy as it is to claim ignorance, we really shouldn't...and can't for that matter. The One Campaign, at the very least, gives us a starting point.

For more information, listen to NPR's story from this morning.

Through friends with common interests and various searches, I've located several books on Haitian history, policy, culture, etc. that have thus far provided priceless information. I commented several weeks ago that a post was in the making which would share something that caught my attention early on in my study and infatuation of Haiti. I've continually noticed that Haiti, throughout its history, has been subject to a series of underminings, both deliberate and unintentional. While I know that my knowledge on such a subject and any subsequent help or assistance I could provide is grossly limited, this subject as been a driving force for my desire to return to Haiti. I can't help but what to immerse myself with a people who were for so long neglected by my own country, only to be abused and manipulated once we decided to take interest.

For time's sake, I'm going to split up "The Undermining of Haiti" into 3-4 segments, with each segment covering what I've gathered from a particular source, such as a book, person, personal experience, etc. For this post, I'll be covering what I've gleaned from Tracy Kidder's Mountains Beyond Mountains: The Quest of Dr. Paul Farmer, A Man Who Would Cure The World. Kidder's biography of Dr. Farmer is, by far, one of the best books I've read this last year. You dive right into the life of a man who is compelled by nothing other than love and hate. Love for a people who have suffered enough for the entire world. And a hatred toward the abuses and neglect they've been subject to. I plunged into the book not knowing what to expect. In fact, I simply borrowed it from a friend who was travelling through Haiti at the time and only decided to read it because I had heard Farmer was a doctor living in Haiti. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is literate!

Tracy Kidder found himself shadowing Dr. Farmer off and on for several years throughout Haiti and, eventually, across the world. What he learns and shares with the reader is invaluable and I would do the book injustice to try to even capture it in this poor excuse for a blog. However, Farmer did share some convicting information concerning the mistreatment of Haiti.

For example, Paul Farmer serves a village named Cange and its outlying areas in Haiti's central plateau. Haiti's largest river, the Artibonite runs through the area and is stopped up by a dam which was planned by the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers and built by Brown and Root of Texas and other U.S. agencies/businesses. The idea behind the dam was "noble", at least on the surface. It was considered a "development project" to provide energry to Port Au-Prince, which was several hours away. However, the dam would also benefit many American-owned agribusinesses downstream while really only servicing the elite within Port Au-Prince.

With little or no notice, the Haitians who for generations had lived along the river living very nice and abundant lives suddenly found their land and homes going underwater. As a result, they were forced to scramble up the mountainsides and fight for less and poorer land, while at the same time stripping whatever land they could find of its resources. Many of those who lived downstream of the dam soon found their land to be too dry to live on and decided to look for work in Port Au-Prince, where many found work cooking, cleaning, stitching up baseballs and American dolls for little or no money. Many of them came back from the capital with AIDS.

Farmer shared that in the 1980's, there was an African swine fever outbreak next door to Haiti in the Dominican Republic. Afraid that this might affect the American pork industry, the U.S. led an effort to destroy all the Creole pigs in Haiti. They then replaced them with pigs purchased from Iowan farmers. However, a big problem was that these pigs were much more delicate and much more expensive to house and feed. While many died off, the ones that did survive, tended to multiply too rapidly for Haitian agriculture and environment. So many Haitian farmers ended up without any pigs. In case this doesn't sound like a big deal, pigs (and any livestock for that matter) are invaluable to a Haitian family, for they were virtually used as bank accounts. At the end of a year, a family would pay for a child's school tuition with a pig. So, no pig means no school for the children.

Thanks to some quick thinking by America, Iowan swine like this either die off rapidly or consume more than a Haitian family can afford.

So what does this mean? How does one who had no say or involvement whatsoever in such measures walk away from such history? America has gotten on the kick of requiring apologies for past sins. For example, banks, churches, and other organizations have offered up repeated apologies and, at times, compensation for supporting/practicing slavery 150 years ago.

While this may work for many a person's conscience here in the States, I doubt an apology will mean much to the average Haitian struggling to make $1/day.

Again, so what does this mean? How does one walk away from such history?

Where does run to?

Of the many attractions that Church Under the Bridge has (ok, so I think I just made our church sounds like a theme park...not my intention), their small groups were one that we were excited about diving into once we became involved. Designed to provide "discipleship, initmacy, and growth" on a completely voluntary level and not pressured or forced, much like my days at seminary. Admittedly, I've always tended to be skeptical of churches and other institutions that use small groups, but with CUB I've always admired their intentions. Meeting under an interstate highway overpass, there's not much room for conversation and intimacy...heck, we don't even have a bathroom! Further, the groups seemed to strive to reach across typical boundaries of money, education, race, etc. The plan for small groups is listed as one of CUB's "Nine Core Values":

Discipleship through Small Groups. With a growing group of unchurched and "baby" Christians, many of whom are living in struggles of immorality and biblical ignorance, a commitment to small groups is the basic tool for discipleship adopted by the Church. Though not ignoring Bible Studies, Sunday sermons, and other forms of discipleship, continued emphasis by small group leaders to recruit church attendees for involvement in weekly or regular small groups is important. Due to the unique needs of people in poverty or marginalization, mature Christians should lead and guide new or young believers into responsible Christian lifestyles.

Surprisingly, after a few months in a terrific group, Faith and I were asked to lead one this past winter. We took the bait and soon found ourselves scrambling to make our home presentable each week. There were the destined up's and down's and everything in between. Typical struggles were trying to maintain a healthy group size and cohesivenss. Absolute joy was found in forming true relationships with people of different backgrounds, races, handicaps, bank accounts, etc.

Now that the summer is here, our group is taking a bit of a break--meeting every other week or so to do community-building activities. Faith and I are hoping to catch our breath and finally find some encouragement, admonishment, and hope from other group leaders. Well, we're still waiting for that to happen. BUT, on one of our monthly visits to the local Christian sideshow, I mean bookstore, I came across a book entitled The Big Book on Small Groups by Jeffrey Arnold. Seeing that I've got about a dozen books waiting on me to finish the mammoth 700 pager that I'm crawling through right now, I opted not to toss out $16 on the book. However, I did get to sit down and thumb through the table of contents and introduction.

Interestingly enough, Arnold right away tries to define small groups by contrasting them to cliques. He does this in a neat list:

Cliques
closed
inward-focused
controlling leadership
past oriented
elitist
static
talk
segmented
unintentional

Small groups
open
outward-focused
spirit led
future oriented
inclusive
fluid/multiplying
do
integrated
intentional

The two lists definitely got me thinking. While I don't totally agree with everything he wrote (specfically, the idea that cliques form unintentionally and that small groups have to form on purpose), I did tend to see truth in much of the analysis. Arnold's given me a start for evaluating our small group.

Do we tend to be inward focused, static, and elitist?
Or are we truly striving to be fluid/multiplying, inclusive, open, and outward-focused?

Over this summer, perhaps this book we come across my path again. At the very least, other small group leaders at CUB will come together for some common purpose. In the meantime, our hopes are that we continue to build relationship with our small group members, while remembering to reach out to others.